numero uno

I'm writing this from my beautiful suite at the golden sands resort in dorado, puerto rico, although, you won't be reading it for at least another week. We have no wi-fi here. Still, it felt important to me to document this in real time. I've spent a vast majority of my time on earth so far in the same small town, so any change from that is still a bit of a novelty to me.

I must say, it's a huge relief to be warm and secure under clean white hotel sheets, with disney channel playing in the background. It's been a long, hard journey getting here. Although, I did a lot better than the last time I flew. I actually only felt nauseous for about ten minutes on our first flight. The hard part this time was not in the flying itself, but rather in the departing of middletown for the airport.

I had to work last night, so while fluff enjoyed a relaxing farewell dinner, I was staring at the clock, counting down the minutes until I was officially allowed to slip into vacation mode. Naturally, the second that I got out, I called him in a frenzy like, dude, i'm ready to go!!!! and he's all nah son, I gotta finish dinner and get a haircut. At ten o'clock at night he had to get a haircut! (granted, his brother was the one cutting his hair, but still) For some reason, this irked me beyond belief. When I finally got to his house, I was already all cranky, and then to add insult to injury, fluff's brother in the next room, decided that the correct way to prepare for a five am flight to puerto rico is to watch the fast and the furious at max volume, so I got zero hours of sleep. When it was finally time to go, it felt like pulling teeth trying to get these dudes in the god damned car and we were of course, sprinting to our gate at the last second.

Of course it was all worth it. By no means am I complaining even one little bit. I could've come here crammed into the trunk of a car, and I still would've been ecstatic to be here. I'm just trying to paint a picture of how confused, and stressed and just absolutely raw I felt. Case in point; I watched bolt on the plane, and absolutely lost it. I'm talking sniffling, tears, the whole nine. The grumpy puerto-rican dude in the seat next to me was looking at me like what the hell is your problem woman?!

As we were descending, we were still over the ocean, so we got an absolutely amazing view of the coast on the way in. when we landed, the whole plane burst into applause (fluff says: only in puerto rico). So, we got off the plane and everything was in spanish! I know that to most people that's probably a given, but i've never been anywhere where english is not the primary language. It just felt so insane to see ads for things like mcdonalds, only in a different language than the one i'm so used to.

Outside, it was pouring. Worse than in ct even! I hardly noticed though, I was so wrapped up in just looking around. The best word I can think of to describe what I was looking at: green. Everywhere. Things growing out of the sides of mountains, along fences and buildings, even in san juan, which is by no means rural.

On the way to our hotel we spotted a truck with pastel pink rims selling food by the side of the road and nearly got ourselves killed pulling a u-turn just to get to it. We ate alcapurias doused in goya hot sauce and a pionono, which was by far, the best street food i've ever tried in my life. Crispy flaky dough surrounding a filling of ground seasoned meat and fried platano. It was beyond perfect. The salty, spicy meat and then soft, sticky-sweet plaintain, all crowned with that golden flaky dough.

Our hotel was, perhaps, the most pleasant surprise of my life. We paid a relatively small amount of money for a villa here, and after reading numerous online reviews that described the place as “out-of-date” and “sub-par”, we weren't expecting much. So imagine our surprise to find our suite was huge and comfortable with five beds, a kitchen complete with dishwasher, two bathrooms (one with a jacuzzi) and two patios, both overlooking this:

never in my wildest dreams did I ever think i'd be this fortunate.

the hotel also has an astounding pool, with waterfalls, jacuzzis and a sweet little bar in the center.It seemed imperative that we hit up this bar immediately, in order
to make it clear to ourselves and everyone else that we were officially on vacation. We ordered an assortment of tropical drinks, my favorite being the black cocconut (j.w. black and coconut water-yum!).

The other place that we drank has a name, but I don't know it. It's on the main strip in dorado, and is identifiable by a large sign that states simply patio bar. But to call it a patio bar is a drastic understatement. There are actually two patios. One high and high lower, both shaded by lush greenery, and the place smells like fucking gardenias and jasmine, which I know sounds like something of weetzie bat, but I swear, it's the truth. We ordered these amazing fried cheese cubes, somewhat akin to mozzarella sticks, only served with a sauce of mashed garlic, mayo and ketchup, which, believe it or not, is my new favorite condiment.

Totally drunk, totally overwhelmed, completely exhausted, we came back to our hotel and slept like babies, eased into dreaming by the lullaby of the coquis. I woke up in the morning a bit dissoriented for a second. I sat up in bed and thought where the fuck am I? And then I remembered.

Paradise.

love always