road trip, day five: LA

i know, i know, i'm supposed to be writing about LA. I've been working on it, believe me. I've started this entry i don't know how many times, only to abandon it after a few sentences. i guess i just feel like LA is a big deal. I mean, I spent a large chunk of my adolescence reading FLB and fantasizing about living there. I jut don't feel like anything i could say would really do it justice.

Actually, I really don't feel like the time I spent in LA did it justice even. It was towards the end of our trip, so I was tired and cranky. I was feeling all twisted up and conflicted and emotional about the fact that I finally made it to California. Half of me wanted to turn around and speed back the other way towards home. I was burdened with the terrible knowledge that my traveling companion and soulmate would be leaving me soon. I was weird. And confused. And slightly psychotic.

On top of that, LA was fucking intense. Our hotel was like a fucking hipster circus.The fact that our bathroom wall was glass made me really uncomfortable because like, what if I had to take a shit? I mean jon and I are close, but not that close.

Hollywood was even more intense.

At a certain point I think I just shut down and went all numb and apathetic about the whole thing. It was just too much for an angtsy, overtired girl to handle, you know?

The one thing I do remember about Los Angeles with perfect, crystal clarity is the fucking meal that we had there.Pedro took us out for bbq in koreatown, and it was seriously the best, most hauntingly satisfying meal I have ever had.
I have not stopped craving that shit since. (Although I hear there's some pretty good korean bbq in oakland as well).We also drank this weird korean booze that tasted like poison but worked like a charm on my hopelessly frazzled nerves.

Later that night we totally were gonna hit up the rooftop bar at our swanky hotel, but when we saw how busy it was and how under-dressed we were compared to the glammed-out barbies and kens that were swarming all over the place, we decided to just retire to our room and watch harry potter instead.

the next morning we had a really overpriced breakfast that consisted of amazing, fresh squeezed juice and the grossest, runniest eggs I have ever paid $20 for.our waiter looked unnervingly like jon circa 2005.

Oh, LA, I'm sorry we didn't really have a chance to bond. Maybe I'll visit again once I've recovered from this whole ordeal and we'll hit it off smashingly like I always imagined we would.

love always

p.s. on the way to LA we totally stopped at In-N-Out burger and that shit was bangin.sorry y'all, i just couldn't help myself.

my heart will always live here

this past week has been exactly everything i could've asked for when leaving the place i grew up. it was like all the things i love about being here happened in rapid succession, like the finale at the fireworks display. i will try my best to show you:
rose-petal-lychee-tini and cucumber martini at koji

tavern classic and truffle fries at plan b

mmm, cherries....

chicken tacos

vietnamese iced coffee

the durham fair, a ct classic

trade shows every two seconds

and of course every hug, every sad goodbye, every last second i got to spend with all the folks i love. see you all at xmas!

love always

fluffems stylie

one of the best things about my vacation in puerto rico, was all the packing. i spent weeks figuring out what to bring, finding the perfect swimsuit, sundress, denim shorts, floppy hat...
what cracks me up, is that fluffems felt the exact same way. he even went so far as to insist that i take numerous different pictures of him, in each of his carefully selected getups, a task that i was more than happy to complete. fluffems' sense of style has become a source of great amusement to me. he is one of the few males i've ever encountered whose fashion risks rival my own.
in the beggining, i was a bit put off by some of the items in his wardrobe. i even went so far as throw away a few choice garments one day when he wasn't at home. since then, however, i've learned to accept his style for what it is. after all, i'd rather be seen with someone whose style clearly shows personality, even if it is a bit ridiculous at times, than someone who always looks bland and boring. in this way, i've come to think of his more, *ahem*, "outlandish" pieces as funny and endearing.
here's an example of a piece that would've ended up at the salvation army. yes, that is a pikachu t-shirt, and it was clearly made for someone about half his size and a quarter of his age.

in this ensemble fluff is trying to channel the spirit of a ten year old girl by simultaneously wearing knee-his and posing like he's in ballet class.

fluff was so excited to finally get to meet his style icon, zac effron. his brother ernie was pretty into it as well.

fluffems' style trademark is none other than the kangol. he has one in every single color known to man. he even has a department store style hat-rack, complete with fake heads, for storing them all.

i must admit, he does clean up pretty nicely, and he is kinda dreamy.



and last but not least, here is my favorite picture of fluff ever, ever, in which he proves how gangsta he really is, depsite the fact that he's wearing women's sunglasses (mine). also, he's wearing a bright blue bowtie which he decided was a good idea after seeing one on some kid from the disney channel. still though, he's a total badass. i doubt that there's anyone else in the world who could put on this same outfit and wear it with as much sauvidad as he can. in the end, that's one of the things i love about him the most. his style is always, one-hundred-percent, utterly and completely his own.

love always

p.s. thanks to k @ blog goggles for giving me the inspiration for this post.

k, i'm done now

i've realized that the monogomaus relationship with writing about puerto rico that i've committed myself to is not really working out. frankly, i'm just not ready settle down like that. maybe someday i'll write a fucking book about it, but for now, i need to be free to explore my blogging options and write about whatever i damn well please.
perhaps in the future we'll get back together, or maybe we'll enjoy a couple of one-night stands when i'm feeling particularly sentimental about it. i'm not sure that i'm ready to let it go completely....
for now, in the interest of having some closure here's some pretty pictures of what we did.
our hotel again, but seriously, that shit was beautiful.

this is me on the previously discussed horse, of which my bar patrons are so envious.

the cemetery. in puerto rico it's important to have sauvidad even in the after life.

bananas plus crazy looking tropical flower, and this is just in fluff's abuela's backyard.

vieques. sometimes i wonder if i dreamed this part.

yup, it's the jungle! but it's also fluff's other abuela's backyard.

okay, now onto more relevant topics....

love always

old town

On the second day, I decided that i'd like to see old san juan. my grandmother had been raving about it to me since childhood. she used to vacation in puerto rico and it was all beautiful, she'd say, but oh, how she loved old san juan, with the cobblestone streets and the quaint little shops and the big, ruined castles that they let you walk around in.
so in much the same fashion that i decided i'd like to go swimming and found, like some sort of miracle, that my wish had been granted, i decided, that very same day, that i'd like to see old juan and found myself en route just a few short hours later.
i was feeling quite romantic about this particular expedition, what with my grandmother's wistful descriptions, and the fact that i was still swooning over the idea that i was actually on a real life tropical island and all. even when the blue sky turned gray and threatened to pour rain all over my plans, even when fluff fell asleep on the way and then snapped at me when i tried to wake him up to look at the amazing scenery, i still felt romantic.
i didn't start feeling unromantic in fact, until the hunger set in. we had been driving in and out of san juan for the past fifteen minutes trying to find a parking spot, but all i could think about was eating.
when we finally did park, we walked straight towards the square in the center of town and looked around, hoping to find sustenance. since we were on a mission to eat only the most authentic, greasy, grimey puerto-rican food, we settled on a place marked san juan food court. unfortunately, it was two in the afternoon and all the vendors in the court had already put away their food for the afternoon. i consoled myself by drinking a coconut full of rum.

after the coconut, we became briefly distracted by all the absolutely outrageous tchockis in the overpriced souvenir shops, but quickly returned to our quest for food. after searching for about twenty minutes, we came to the conclusion that the only food available in san juan was ridiculously overpriced and decidedly not puerto-rican. we settled on a tapas restaurant called toro salao where i was finally able to order a salad. i thought that the food was awesome, but everyone else ordered croquetas with jamon serrano and then complained that the ham tasted weird.(i got my revenge later that afternoon when i sullked the entire time we were in senor frogs, a tourist trap where they sell you frozen drinks for eighteen dollars that don't even get you drunk.)

my favorite part of the day though, was when we visited the castillo de san cristobal and pretended that it was a playground.




love always

numero uno

I'm writing this from my beautiful suite at the golden sands resort in dorado, puerto rico, although, you won't be reading it for at least another week. We have no wi-fi here. Still, it felt important to me to document this in real time. I've spent a vast majority of my time on earth so far in the same small town, so any change from that is still a bit of a novelty to me.

I must say, it's a huge relief to be warm and secure under clean white hotel sheets, with disney channel playing in the background. It's been a long, hard journey getting here. Although, I did a lot better than the last time I flew. I actually only felt nauseous for about ten minutes on our first flight. The hard part this time was not in the flying itself, but rather in the departing of middletown for the airport.

I had to work last night, so while fluff enjoyed a relaxing farewell dinner, I was staring at the clock, counting down the minutes until I was officially allowed to slip into vacation mode. Naturally, the second that I got out, I called him in a frenzy like, dude, i'm ready to go!!!! and he's all nah son, I gotta finish dinner and get a haircut. At ten o'clock at night he had to get a haircut! (granted, his brother was the one cutting his hair, but still) For some reason, this irked me beyond belief. When I finally got to his house, I was already all cranky, and then to add insult to injury, fluff's brother in the next room, decided that the correct way to prepare for a five am flight to puerto rico is to watch the fast and the furious at max volume, so I got zero hours of sleep. When it was finally time to go, it felt like pulling teeth trying to get these dudes in the god damned car and we were of course, sprinting to our gate at the last second.

Of course it was all worth it. By no means am I complaining even one little bit. I could've come here crammed into the trunk of a car, and I still would've been ecstatic to be here. I'm just trying to paint a picture of how confused, and stressed and just absolutely raw I felt. Case in point; I watched bolt on the plane, and absolutely lost it. I'm talking sniffling, tears, the whole nine. The grumpy puerto-rican dude in the seat next to me was looking at me like what the hell is your problem woman?!

As we were descending, we were still over the ocean, so we got an absolutely amazing view of the coast on the way in. when we landed, the whole plane burst into applause (fluff says: only in puerto rico). So, we got off the plane and everything was in spanish! I know that to most people that's probably a given, but i've never been anywhere where english is not the primary language. It just felt so insane to see ads for things like mcdonalds, only in a different language than the one i'm so used to.

Outside, it was pouring. Worse than in ct even! I hardly noticed though, I was so wrapped up in just looking around. The best word I can think of to describe what I was looking at: green. Everywhere. Things growing out of the sides of mountains, along fences and buildings, even in san juan, which is by no means rural.

On the way to our hotel we spotted a truck with pastel pink rims selling food by the side of the road and nearly got ourselves killed pulling a u-turn just to get to it. We ate alcapurias doused in goya hot sauce and a pionono, which was by far, the best street food i've ever tried in my life. Crispy flaky dough surrounding a filling of ground seasoned meat and fried platano. It was beyond perfect. The salty, spicy meat and then soft, sticky-sweet plaintain, all crowned with that golden flaky dough.

Our hotel was, perhaps, the most pleasant surprise of my life. We paid a relatively small amount of money for a villa here, and after reading numerous online reviews that described the place as “out-of-date” and “sub-par”, we weren't expecting much. So imagine our surprise to find our suite was huge and comfortable with five beds, a kitchen complete with dishwasher, two bathrooms (one with a jacuzzi) and two patios, both overlooking this:

never in my wildest dreams did I ever think i'd be this fortunate.

the hotel also has an astounding pool, with waterfalls, jacuzzis and a sweet little bar in the center.It seemed imperative that we hit up this bar immediately, in order
to make it clear to ourselves and everyone else that we were officially on vacation. We ordered an assortment of tropical drinks, my favorite being the black cocconut (j.w. black and coconut water-yum!).

The other place that we drank has a name, but I don't know it. It's on the main strip in dorado, and is identifiable by a large sign that states simply patio bar. But to call it a patio bar is a drastic understatement. There are actually two patios. One high and high lower, both shaded by lush greenery, and the place smells like fucking gardenias and jasmine, which I know sounds like something of weetzie bat, but I swear, it's the truth. We ordered these amazing fried cheese cubes, somewhat akin to mozzarella sticks, only served with a sauce of mashed garlic, mayo and ketchup, which, believe it or not, is my new favorite condiment.

Totally drunk, totally overwhelmed, completely exhausted, we came back to our hotel and slept like babies, eased into dreaming by the lullaby of the coquis. I woke up in the morning a bit dissoriented for a second. I sat up in bed and thought where the fuck am I? And then I remembered.

Paradise.

love always

warning!

i returned home to soggy, rainy connecticut early this morning after spending the past week in puerto rico. i worked a double, with only an hour long break to deposit my check into my empty bank account. i felt a sharp, stabbing pang in my chest everytime i remembered that this time yesterday i was somewhere else. needless to say, i'm a bit melancholy about being here.
the past week was everything a vacation could possibly hope to be; good, bad, rainy, sunny, humid, exhausting, emotional, unreal, exciting, terrifying, frustrating. i have stories to tell, pictures to show, moments to relive. i'm still in the process of digesting it all.
at the moment it seems pretty unlikely that i will want to write about anything besides this trip for what may seem like an unreasonably long time to some of you. for this i appologize in advance and offer up my sincerest hopes that it doesn't get old too quickly.

these are words that i need to write.


love always

forget sarah marshall, i'd rather have mila kunis

i've been avoiding this movie for quite some time now. from what i could gather, it was just annother american pie knockoff (and i didn't even like the original!), filled with sexist, immature bathroom humor, and lots of naked chicks. needless to say, my prude, feminist ass does not do well with that sort of thing. sunday however, i was so emotionally wasted/hungover that when fluff put it on i didn't even bother to argue, assuming that i'd fall asleep before i caught anything that seriously offended me. thus, i was pleasantly surprised when i not only stayed awake for the entire time, but i also kind of enjoyed watching it.
don't get me wrong now, it was exactly everything i thought it would be. the first half of the movie is spent building a case for why the title character is such a ginormous, evil uber-slut for cheating on protagonist peter, and then "moving on too quickly" after they broke up. yet, in the second half, he cheats on his new girlfriend, rachel, and the movie closes with her forgiving him. can you say double fucking standard?
in addition to that, peter is a total d-bag. when sarah is basically like "dude, i broke up with you because you let yourself go and sat around the apartment eating fucking fruit loops all day, and being a huge waste of oxygen", i can totally relate to her. i would've broken up with his sorry ass too.
here's why the movie is even remotely enjoyable: mila kunis as rachel. to say that she was compelling would be a gross understatement. she was charming, feisty, sensual, witty, passionate, genuine, way too good for that jack ass peter and oh yeah, she was totally fucking hot.
now, i'm not the type to usually say that about females. i've had my fair share of lesbian experiences, and trust me when i say that they did not turn out so well. every once in a while though, there's that one random girl who just totally does it for me. mila kunis' character in this movie just so happens to fall into that category.
it's also worth mentioning the fact that i think russel brand did a fabulous job as well. i saw him host the mtv vmas last year and he was a total trainwreck. in this movie however, he plays up these subtle nuances in his character that make him come off as endearing, rather than obnoxious. for example, when he breaks up with his girlfriend, he seems ever so slightly bummed, whereas i think most actors would've played that part as though he didn't even give a shit. he added some depth to the role, which was nice.
so rather than actually getting invested in the story, i spent the duration of the movie fantasizing about a threesome with mila kunis and russell brand. kinky, yes, but it just goes to show that even in the shitiest of shitshows there is occasionally some tasty little morsel worth staying awake for......or lusting over.

love always

really cheesy songs i like, part deux

in order to tell you about this amazing piece of musical genius, i have to make a confession.
i'm twenty-four years old and i watch the disney channel .
yes, yes, i know this may seem a bit immature, but in my defense it was fluff who got me hooked on it, and like many things that i enjoy, it's harmless and comforting.
now that that's off my chest, i can tell you that the other day i was watching disney, when i saw the video for the new demi lovato song and immediately fell in love. it's called "don't forget" and it's so simple that even i could probably figure out how to play it on the guitar.
i have a love-hate relationship with demi lovato. she's like the ghost of what i thought i wanted to be when i grew up. she's so fucking pretty. and she's young. and her voice sounds the way mine used to sound before i smoked cigarettes for ten years. even more jealousy-inspiring is the fact that she got to star in camp rock. i seriously would've given up my pinky finger for that part.
in any case, here's another confession:
i actually bought the cd from itunes. i liked the song so much that i couldn't even wait to download it illegaly, so i went out and purchased the damn thing. i've been listening to it non-stop ever since.

love always

everything was worth this

i'm truly, truly ecstatic right now. i just received conformation from expedia that i did indeed purchase a round-trip ticket to san juan, puerto rico, and i will for sure be leaving CT for puerto rico on may 6th!!!! i can't even believe that shit is real!

sometimes i get scared that i won't do enough stuff before i die. that's there's just too much beauty in the world and i won't be able to experience enough of it. that's why things like this make me so happy. i get to step outside of my little box and really do something new.

now, of course the most essential part of such a vacation is figuring out which swimsuit i should buy to bring with me. for this, i have been neurotically consulting the orchid boutique . i can't decide between the aqua de arcoiris from aqua bendita or the dezert love bikini from maaji.....
in addition to my little trip to p.r., i'm also planning another big adventure in september, but more about that later. suffice to say that right now i'm not so upset about losing that job anymore.

love always

okay, so i lied

i really honestly thought i wouldn't be devastated if quest crew won the season. who the fuck was i kidding? of course it was devastating! america hates females and that's all it really comes down to.
yes, quest did a few really cool tricks, and during britney week, they almost had me. im glad that the crew who won was actually capable of dancing. but in all honesty, beatfreaks deserved that title.
(it did not help that fluff teased me mercilessly about the fact that they lost. he got me feeling really sulky and resentful.)
the best part though, by far was when j.c. (swoon) called quest "america's best hair crew". that shit had me dying.
next season, i am forming an all-girl crew, and we better win that shit!

love always